Hey, It’s Me, That Baby You’re Talking About Having!

An open letter to hypothetical parents, from your hypothetical baby

Hey guys. It’s me, that hypothetical baby you’ve been having a discussion about. So you’re wondering about whether now is a good time to have a baby? Normally hypothetical babies like me don’t get to participate in these discussions, but I’ve been feeling left out. Pardon me if it sounds like I’ve been eavesdropping on your conversations. I haven’t been, I swear, but I’d like to get some things off what would become my chest. So…